a Lesson

I made a mistake.

...tainting the canvas of false-perfection that painted the lies of my existence -

*I*

made a mistake.

Never to be confused again with the possibility of Extraordinary.. Just Ordinary because *I* *made* - you think that I was S.U.P.E.R.H.U.M.A.N. Superhuman.

or, A "Specially, Unique Person, Evidently Raised with a Humble Upbringing"-type woMAN.

I remained docile.. until I wasn't.

You threw me a penny. I emerged with a nickel.

You threw me a nickel. I emerged with a dime.

You threw me a dime. I emerged with a quarter.

You threw me a quarter. & I stopped coming back.

I had a false sense of prosperity... cashing in the wealth of wisdom for a few chips of fun. Gambling away the years of freedom I had labored for. I was looking for 6's and a rolled a couple of 1's. The eyes to the snake that poisoned my mind. Die. Because by the end of the night, I was the only one on a roll.

It's Funny how no one probably caught that.

But yet and still... *I* made a mistake.

I made myself a part of the Masses.

& I thought I grew up,

until I threw up -

the identity of a young woman.. Leaving the meess of a child.

Confused.

I look in the mirror. No reflection because I lost - myself.

Daddy's little girl. Turned "Daddy's BIG... Disappointment".

& no one ever explains to you how heavily that weighs. But then again how could they tell you if they maybe never even had a daddy to disappoint.

Anyway, to get to that lesson..

All in all:

You can't be "good" without doing most things right. & if you do most things right, you mind as well be perfect. So of course, you can't be perfect if you actually have flaws. I guess what I'm really trying to say is, Above all, don't go and be human, and go making mistakes.

#poetry #lesson